February 28, 2011
“for instance, why can’t Canada invite a distant branch of the British royal family to immigrate to Canada and found a Canadian royal family? it’s archaic, i realize, but consider this, Canada: Americans spend hundreds of millions of dollars every year just to go to London to stare at Buckingham Palace—a building that looks like a large post office—because the queen lives there. if a queen lived right next door, Americans would spend some of that money in Canada. so if you want your own head of state, import some royals, find an empty post office in Ottawa somewhere and start calling it “Maple Leaf Palace,” hire your queen a marching band, and start raking in the tourist dough. if French Canadians complain about being ruled by English-speaking royals, make marrying a French Bourbon a condition of sitting on the throne of Canada.”
– dan savage on xanax

aaaahahahaha i am dying of laughter.